205: judy (dying in the cabin)

brennan, come here, honey. light the candles, i want to get a look at this wound. it feels bad. oh, god, it’s all pus and it looks infected. does it look infected to you brennan? christ almighty. i feel weak, my life is being drained by this wound. no, no, stay there, don’t you move. the last thing you need is to die out there trying to save my life. not going to happen. just stay here, let me talk to you. let me be with another human being before i die. we’re among the last, brennan. the last human beings on earth. when i’m gone it’ll be you and … who knows. someone else has to be out there, right? i’m sure you’ll find people. i’m sorry you’ll have to go alone. you know you can’t carry me anymore and besides, i don’t want to be carried. i want to die with dignity, die next to my husband in the warmth of this cabin, not out there with those things, or frozen in the cold. i want to see your face flush with warmth, next to the fireplace, and feel your warm, rough hands against me. that’s all i’ve ever wanted. and then, then i can die in peace and you can just leave me here, seated in the armchair, staring at the dying embers of a dying fire. sounds morbid, i know, but it’s the most beautiful way i can think to die. i love you, brennan. i know you know that, but … i do. i couldn’t have picked a better man to spend my life with. and … when you find … our children. tell them i miss them, so, so much. oh god.