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267monologues

137: genevieve

describe him? well, alright, constable, i’m afraid i didn’t get a good look at him and i’m not the greatest at remembering details but … i’d say he was seven feet tall, maybe 400 pounds, give or take. he had three hands–he had two regular hands and then a third hand that laid on the top of his head. i think it was growing out of the back of his head? and it flopped on the top of his head like it was his hair or something. i only saw it briefly when he tipped his top hat at us. his face was, um, his cheeks were bulging because he was chewing on bulgur wheat that kept falling out of his mouth, i mean he really filled it up all the way. his eyes were sunken and very dark, very morbid looking, and one of the eyes was just a hole where an eye would go, except instead there was this little man, or this beast thing, it looked like a hairless bear man, and occasionally it would prop open his eyelid with a piece of wood, like i think half of a matchstick or something like that, and it would just gaze out at the world. i would say it is mostly bear. his nose was dripping bright yellow liquid at a regular rate, and he would dab it with a kerchief that got more and more yellow as things went on. the yellow was glowing and when we moved into the dim study i could tell it was glowing in the dark. eventually he threw the kerchief into the rubbish bin and procured another from inside his jacket pocket. he blew his nose and it sounded like the low rumble of thunder. he then, and this was strange, he *ate* the kerchief after he blew his nose. needless to say we were all disgusted, but then he began to speak with this cadence to his voice that put us at ease instantly. i nearly fell asleep, in fact. he lulled us into this false sense of security before killing iain and taking the jewels. it’s surprising he could even hold them, as his arms and hands were actually slippery eels. did i mention that part? slippery eel hands. oh constable, you need to apprehend him right away, before it’s too late! but don’t get too close, as he emits a pungent odor from his skin that, if inhaled too closely, will cause you to die. it’s how he got iain! i swear this is all true, constable! i swear it!

By Josh

I'm the guy who owns this site, ya dummy.

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