This contrasts with the traditional job hunt because people everywhere will tell you, “Get your foot in the door,” to make yourself known to your potential manager or hiring manager. To look presentable. To shake hands, maintain eye contact. To, in essence, be a human being (leaning towards being yourself, but not necessary).
Everyone thinks that the Internet is the new hip place for finding work. There are hundreds of job sites and resume building sites out there, and there are also thousands of potential employers hunched over their computers typing out the latest position they need filled. Craigslist alone has tons of ads for work, and people who surf craigslist are just as eager to get the job they’re looking for. But there’s always a catch.
Right now I’m looking for work. I’ve tried both sides: the traditional path of walking to a location, filling out an application, and handing it to the appropriate person (or, at the very least, talking to them on the telephone), and I have also tried the Internet sites. The former option could be more successful in showcasing myself (and dim down the fact that I have shit for work experience), but the latter is just more quantity, and easier to apply for, that the appeal outweighs the risks. You mean all I have to do is hit “apply” and my pre-loaded resume and cover letter will just be sent to them? Or that I have to e-mail someone and attach my resume? From the comfort of my home? Done and done!
It shouldn’t surprise you that 95% of the jobs listed on craigslist are entry-level or worse. General labor. Housecleaning. Babysitting. Why should they be anything else? What CEO of a major corporation is going to go to craigslist looking for his next VP? What jewelry store owner is going to consult a faceless Internet crowd of hooligans for their next manager, the man or woman who will hold the keys to millions of dollars of jewelry?
There isn’t, nor will there ever be, a way to properly network yourself on the Internet. Until the day Facebook fully incorporates business into their profiles (which seems like it would cause a lawsuit), all you will be when searching/applying for a job is a Name and a Resume. In a way it highlights the resume like never before. Now is the time for fancy fonts and creative exaggeration. If only business resumes were like acting resumes, where at the very least you got to see the person’s face…
I’ve gotten a couple of responses via the Internet job postings. The quickest one came from Quiznos. No surprise there. It was like the instant I hit the send button I got a reply — “Can we get an interview tomorrow?” and all that. You’d think a food service place would be the first to try to get some solid information about a person before they up and hired them. I guess that’s what the interview portion is for, but still. I’m only going because I’m desperate; I hate the food service industry and because of it’s strict laws on food handling, coupled with the finicky nature of most people these days regarding their meals, it makes me totally nervous. “You only wanted one tomato? Well this sandwich has two, so … okay, okay, one tomato, got it. No need to yell.” That sort of thing.
The perfect job for me would be a data entry job where I could type out shit for 45 minutes if I was guaranteed 15 minutes to browse the Internet. That would be awesome. That plus a lunch break and free sodas would make me the happiest person alive. Alternately, the exact opposite would also be great — some kind of outside job where I got to hangglide or something. Wrestle bears. Spelunk. Too bad I don’t have any experience with any of that.
I forgot to mention the other stupid part of the Internet job-hunting sites: spam. In a way I like it because it forces me to study the ads closer so that I don’t, you know, get twenty viruses on my computer or something.
In truth, I’m partially terrified because if I don’t get a job quick, I’m not going to have rent money, and that would be bad. On the other hand, I can’t be too worried or else it’ll fuck me up in other ways, like lack of sleep and headaches and all that. I hate that. Plus I know if I can’t make rent I can always live with my parents, but that would be shitty for my roommates. And I don’t want to live with my parents.
Somehow things always seem to work out for me in the end. Let’s hope that luck continues until the end of the month.
And that, my friends, is that.
