183: chuck (destitute)

i’ve been destitute for a long time. the sidewalk just feels like home at this point. sun, rain, snow, it doesn’t matter, i’ll find a way to sleep. i’ve had people shout at me, people actually throw their change in my face. one time a rich guy, or at least he looked rich, he pulled a money clip from his pocket, pulled out a twenty dollar bill, and, i’m not shitting you, he threw it into the gutter right next to me. just tossed it like it was nothing. i scrambled to get it but at that time i was drunk, high, or withdrawing hard most of the time so my reflexes weren’t that great. i try not to sit next to gutters anymore.

vagrants these days, they have all these funny signs. “need weed money,” or shit like that. one lady a few blocks from me, well, i should say, it’s a whole family. dad, mom, and their kid. cute kid. the family was nice too, genuinely sobered up but destitute, you know, so they have this sign, i can’t remember exactly what it said but basically they take the money they earn and go stay at a hotel at night, and the next morning they tape the new receipt to their sign. they’re like, “here, here’s proof that we’re trying.” so you got that and you got the guys with signs like “i just need a beer” or whatever. trying to be funny.

the funny ones piss me off. they ain’t really broke. you’ll see ’em walk to a car, drive off somewhere. they’re just fucking around. keeping guys like me from getting a fair shot. but that’s what the world’s like isn’t it. same template as the rich, just set on the poor.

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