032: dr. holtz

which opinion is this? come on you can tell me. fifth? sixth? i mean i can understand if i’m the second opinion, or even the third, but to come in here and ask for a fifth opinion, or a sixth opinion … i’m kind of hurt, chad. i’d like to be the doctor that reverses what the first doctor said. he’s like, “it’s cancer” and then i’m like, “no chad your blood tests came in and it is not cancer,” but now, i’m looking at these reports you brought me and … four out of five doctors say it’s not cancer, and the one who did isn’t even a doctor but a naturopath. why did you even come here, chad? why did you ruin my good day with this? my wife called me this morning, my son dieter just took his first steps, she put it up on youtube and i watched it while consulting with this old man with dementia… it was beautiful. but now this. why couldn’t i be the first, chad? you’re not the first person to do this to me. is it … am i so far down the ladder? look, i’ll admit it. i get half of my business being the third, fourth, fifth, opinion. how many opinions do people need, chad?! i went to medical school, twelve years i was in medical school, i did my residency at cedars-sinai for chrissakes, and now i’m just parroting what four other doctors have already said. “it’s not cancer.” it’s not cancer, chad. it’s not cancer. you want me to give you the names of twelve other doctors who will tell you it’s not cancer? it’s not. fucking. cancer.

now, do me a favor before you go, chad. next time you have what you think is a life-threatening illness, come to me second. that’s all i ask.

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